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Joshua1980 Jan 17, 2013 (12:16 AM)  


Joined: Oct 14, 2012
759339

hi alleyk. man it sounds like your having a little bit of a ruff time there. don't give in please its not worth it. thats what i tell myself when i'm stressed or upset i tell myself F it i'm gonna have a smoke, then i tell myself "ok but what is a cigarette gonna solve. cause a cigarette doesn't help or can do anything to help the problem at hand. congrats on your 2 weeks of smoke free. see i'm having somewhat a hard time myself cause i would give in and have just one then the next thing i know i'm smoking a little for a few days then i stop and come back on here. but i keep on picking myself up and try it again. i'm gonna keep on trying to quit smoking until i quit smoking. i hope i've been some help alleyk take care and keep the quit and don't forget N.O.P.E



My Milage:

My Quit Date: 1/9/2013
Smoke-Free Days: 8
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 144
Amount Saved: $14.40
Life Gained:
Days: 1 Hrs: 0 Mins: 37 Seconds: 11

tango21 Jan 16, 2013 (09:52 PM)  


Joined: Jul 25, 2011
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Gender: Male
Hobbies: Cross Country Wrestling,Time Travel(Level 2)
759331

Hey AlleyK! I'm not going to weigh in on the husband thing but I do want to say congratulations on two weeks. I can't imagine having to quit while someone close to you still smokes. So I'm going to make that "double congratulations!"lol. Keep it strong and best of luck!
Tango


My Milage:

My Quit Date: 1/1/2013
Smoke-Free Days: 15
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 375
Amount Saved: $150.00
Life Gained:
Days: 2 Hrs: 13 Mins: 19 Seconds: 17

"In Soviet Russia, cigarette smoke you!"

Punam Jan 16, 2013 (09:21 PM)  


Joined: Jun 03, 2012
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Age: 58
Gender: Female
Country: Canada
759329

Hi Alleyk
 
First, congratulations on getting through 2 weeks! That's a big deal and you should be really proud of yourself.
 
Maybe your husband feels threatened by the fact that you're accomplishing this while he's not ready to try. Ok, that was my impersonation of Freud, and I'll stop now :) Seriously, maybe you can have a calm chat with your husband (when you're feeling strong and can do this comfortably) and mention that one of the issues here is that you're trying to ensure that his children's mother lives longer....I wonder if he might be able to relate to that and be more supportive of you. That said, you're winning the battle with this addiction and you should absolutely celebrate your strength. I'm cheering for you.
 
 


My Milage:

My Quit Date: 12/23/2012
Smoke-Free Days: 24
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 696
Amount Saved: $270.05
Life Gained:
Days: 3 Hrs: 11 Mins: 12 Seconds: 36

The only disability in life is a bad attitude

kas Jan 16, 2013 (08:58 PM)  


Joined: Nov 07, 2012
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Occupation: Non-Smoker
Hobbies: Anything Tobacco Free
759327

Dear alleyk,
Short-term pain for long term-gain.  You are going to be okay.  You can't be everything to everybody right now.  You need to be there for you!  Your family will just have to find a way to be supportive.  Beating yourself up and calling yourself names isn't going to help matters.  You are just in your second week and this isn't easy this early on.  You have come far but have quite a wonderful journey ahead. 
Keep posting and using your coping techniques. Have a chat with hubby when the kids aren't around and tell him what you need.
 


My Milage:

My Quit Date: 11/6/2012
Smoke-Free Days: 71
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 639
Amount Saved: $332.28
Life Gained:
Days: 6 Hrs: 15 Mins: 37 Seconds: 8

Short Term Pain for Long Term Gain

Become Non Smoker Jan 16, 2013 (08:51 PM)  


Joined: Sep 19, 2012
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Age: 35
Occupation: Full time non smoker
Hobbies: Not Smoking anymore! :)
759326

That's too bad :-(. Keep your head up and give yourself a break. It's easy to lose control sometimes, smoking or not and the thing is, a smoke isn't going to fix this problem. If you stay focused on your quit and keep trucking along you will reap the rewards of freedom. It seems tough right now I know, but you really have to take it day by day and hour by hour. Eventually the time passes and all of the sudden your through zombie month! Now that you've calmed down, is there anything you think you could have done to avoid blowing up? It's a silly question but if there is anything there, give it a shot next time. What was happening specifically to cause the blow up? At my house we have three kids under 6 and the dinner hour sometimes gets so crazy that it would cause someone who hasn't had a ciggy in their life to flip out :). Well sorry for rambling, hope you can find something useful here. Hope you feel better.

My Milage:

My Quit Date: 9/16/2012
Smoke-Free Days: 122
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 2,440
Amount Saved: $878.40
Life Gained:
Days: 16 Hrs: 2 Mins: 57 Seconds: 16

Keep calm, carry on

kitcanquit Jan 16, 2013 (08:44 PM)  


Joined: Nov 29, 2012
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Age: 55
Gender: Female
Country: Canada
759325

Quitting smoking is very emotional business.  One minute we are fine and the next we are falling apart.  You are doing so well and it only gets better.  Anytime you need to vent, please come here.  That's what we are here for.  We've all been there and are still on our journeys to freedom. 


My Milage:

My Quit Date: 10/3/2012
Smoke-Free Days: 105
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 2,625
Amount Saved: $1,260.00
Life Gained:
Days: 12 Hrs: 21 Mins: 58 Seconds: 3

DaddyB Jan 16, 2013 (08:44 PM)  


Joined: Nov 25, 2012
Age: 54
Gender: Male
Country: Canada
Occupation: Senior Operator
Hobbies: Being a Grandpa, Father, and Husband, Music and Computers
759324

Hi Alleyk; Like you, I'm quitting and my spouse is not and is clearly not ready. I had to accept that when I started down this road and so do you. Quitting is a personal battle and yes, at first you have to be pretty selfish in order to make it, but there are some things you can do to dampen the blow on family and friends.
 
First, let them know that you will be moody and quick to anger for a little while and you just can't help it. Ask for help but be specific as to what you want. I asked my spouse to please hide all of her cigarettes from my view and to smoke only in one room of the house, disposing of any butts immediately. She has been very good about this so for me, it's her way of helping. I told her that if she is not ready to quit, then I want her to hide it from me so I don't know about it.
 
I told my kids to try and understand that it's the nicotine that is making me kind of jumpy and that all would be well in time. If you do think you're going to blow a fuse...run to another room, take a few deep breaths and calm down before you say anything. It's amazing how a few moments of clear thought can calm your spirit.
 
Lastly, you have to praise yourself for your success. Be happy for you because this is likely one of the toughest battles you'll ever fight and every minute you go without a cigarette is a minute of freedom you have earned, a gift you have given yourself.
 
Save your cigarette money and reward yourself for a job well done.
 
You can do this, I'm sure of it. Just take your time, be patient with yourself, and forgive yourself for these little outbursts from time to time. You'll get past it.
 
Hugs!
 
Daddy B. 


My Milage:

My Quit Date: 1/1/2013
Smoke-Free Days: 15
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 375
Amount Saved: $120.00
Life Gained:
Days: 2 Hrs: 17 Mins: 32 Seconds: 11

alleyk Jan 16, 2013 (08:41 PM)  


Joined: Jan 02, 2013
759323

Thank you everyone
It truly does help getting feedback, and brings tears to my eyes.
Everything was positive feedback and nice to hear kind words.  I do need to do this for myself..and I realize you cant make someone quit..
Unfortnatley I was having a moment and took it out on the ones I love.
After apologizing to "the husband" he's not that easy to talk to by the way, he didnt really feel for me...he went to bed instead. 


My Milage:

My Quit Date: 1/3/2013
Smoke-Free Days: 13
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 169
Amount Saved: $67.60
Life Gained:
Days: 1 Hrs: 3 Mins: 40 Seconds: 16

Become Non Smoker Jan 16, 2013 (08:36 PM)  


Joined: Sep 19, 2012
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Age: 35
Occupation: Full time non smoker
Hobbies: Not Smoking anymore! :)
759322

lots of good info in this thread from this morning as well under coping with cravings/withdrawal: OMG we are going to kill each other. The other post you should read is from Sparkey in the all time favorites called "when couples quit". Good luck alley. Hope you feel better.

My Milage:

My Quit Date: 9/16/2012
Smoke-Free Days: 122
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 2,440
Amount Saved: $878.40
Life Gained:
Days: 16 Hrs: 2 Mins: 55 Seconds: 16

Keep calm, carry on

Become Non Smoker Jan 16, 2013 (08:29 PM)  


Joined: Sep 19, 2012
Personal Image
Age: 35
Occupation: Full time non smoker
Hobbies: Not Smoking anymore! :)
759321

Great posts Pamela and Kit. Alley you have achieved two weeks of freedom from cigarettes! That is outstanding! Your hubby will forgive you for blowing up on him when you explain yourself. Let him know how you are feeling. Next time you feel like blowing up come here and yell at us :). We can take it and we know how hard it is to quit smoking. So take a deep breath, step back and give yourself a pat on the back for getting through two of the hardest weeks you'll ever have to endure! Good luck!

My Milage:

My Quit Date: 9/16/2012
Smoke-Free Days: 122
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 2,440
Amount Saved: $878.40
Life Gained:
Days: 16 Hrs: 2 Mins: 54 Seconds: 21

Keep calm, carry on

kitcanquit Jan 16, 2013 (08:22 PM)  


Joined: Nov 29, 2012
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Age: 55
Gender: Female
Country: Canada
759320

Hi Alleyk, are you quitting cold turkey or some form of NRT?  You are past hell week and almost finished heck week.  Don't worry about him not quitting, just worry about you.  You are doing great! 


My Milage:

My Quit Date: 10/3/2012
Smoke-Free Days: 105
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 2,625
Amount Saved: $1,260.00
Life Gained:
Days: 12 Hrs: 21 Mins: 55 Seconds: 20

Pamela, Moderator Jan 16, 2013 (08:19 PM)  


Joined: Nov 23, 2009
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Age: 53
Gender: Female
Country: Canada
759318

alleyk
 
What are you gaining from being so upset with and focused on him?   You do know from experience one has to be ready to quit.   Sounds like you are there...   Kudos to you girl. 
 
Hmmmm, sounds like you forgetting to see the success in what you alone have accomplished so far...  2 weeks is no joke...   Something truly to be proud of!
 
You have the SHO family who can support and encourage you.  Post often, I am sure other members will share their experiences, so you will see you are not alone and the only one to go through this.   
 
Keep your chin up!  You're doing fabulous!!
 
Pamela, Moderator

Smokers' Helpline Online Suppport Team

alleyk Jan 16, 2013 (08:04 PM)  


Joined: Jan 02, 2013
759313

It will be 2wks tmrw i've been quit. I wrote before about me quitting and husband didnt.
Well i'm going through stages of being fine then not. I havent slipped at all thank god.
But today I was sooo miserable...or mean. I snapped at my daughter a couple times, and my husband well gave him a peace of my mind about how I quit and all these wives talked about how their husbands have quit and told him but not mine you dont even want to try for me and the kids!!
I told him hes not supportive, doesnt tell me im doing a good job..etc etc.
How do I get over this, over him not quitting, over my mood swings and taking it out on everyone and being one heck of a *****y mom and wife that no one wants to talk to ...which makes me want to go back smoking.


My Milage:

My Quit Date: 1/3/2013
Smoke-Free Days: 13
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 169
Amount Saved: $67.60
Life Gained:
Days: 1 Hrs: 3 Mins: 37 Seconds: 12

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